Inside the Light: A Death in the Family
Father Ray draws open the church doors and places a funeral sign out front. Meanwhile at the bar, Jonathan stares at Tammy's wedding photo. He wears a tee shirt over long johns, dubious funeral attire. Up close Sarah gazes back at him from her rocker on the bar. The "Far Way" song plays as Jonathan kisses the picture. Reva enters the pub, rendering her son a reticent smile. At the farm, Josh watches as Cassie carefully folds clothes into a large suitcase. RJ joins them in the main room. All three are dressed for the service.
At the Aituro's, Daisy fidgets in her brown dress, expressing to Gus her distain for funerals. Donning a gray pinstriped suit, Gus misanthropically reminds her that it's the least she can do since her boyfriend ran Tammy down. Daisy hushes Gus. He retorts that he would have already told Harley about all her drinking and drug problems if he'd wanted her to know about them. Once again, he reminds her that this is her shot to turn her life around. Harley strolls in feeling helpless because she can't pin Gillespie for the murder or get him to reveal who paid him to do it. She also can't find her earring and frowns. When Daisy hands the earring to Harley, Harley gazes at her daughter as if she's priceless. As they hug, Gus stares at Daisy.
At the station, Frank, Marina and Remy argue about the progress of the case against Gillespie. Frank admonishes Remy once again for taking matters into his own hands. Marina reasons with Frank to allow her to put more pressure on Gillespie.
The Spauldings appear to have a new dining room table and floral centerpiece. Alan strides into the room, looking for his suit jacket. Dressed in black, Beth fusses behind him that attending the funeral is a bad idea amid all the rumors about his part in Tammy's death. Alan believes that not attending gives validity to those rumors. Lizzie, demurred by a conservative hair bun, strolls in and agrees with her grandfather. Beth frankly labels them both delusional because Alan still thinks he can get the baby and Lizzie still believes she can hang onto Jonathan.
Reva and Billy have come to Outskirts to pick Jonathan up for the funeral, but Jonathan has no plans to attend a stuffy service with a bunch of people he didn't like or who didn't know Tammy. They encourage him that it's important to say goodbye. Jonathan has everything he needs to say goodbye right here. Reva kisses a locket and then places it on the bar, saying that maybe it will help. As she leaves with Billy, Jonathan retrieves the locket and the recognition of it causes him to tremble and sob.
At the church Josh escorts Cassie and RJ into the sanctuary and they view a gold framed collage of Tammy's photos. Cassie ambles over and touches the casket. RJ remembers the time Josh took him to his father's grave and said that he can talk to his dad anytime he wants. RJ says that he feels the same way about his sister. In the vestibule, Reva glances out at the street and Billy assures her that Jonathan will come if he feels the need.
Feeding Sarah her bottle, Jonathan asks her what she thinks they will say about Tammy at the funeral. He wonders if she will be able to hear them or if she can hear him right now. His bruised hand lifts the locket. He kisses it and continues to rock the baby.
As Reva and Cassie stand before the casket, Reva mentions that it isn't fair. The next funeral belonged to her, not Tammy. Cassie asks her if Reva really thinks that Cassie would feel better if she were burying her sister instead of her daughter. Reva utters that it's different. Cassie agrees, but she's glad that Reva's here now. She's never needed her more. Reva embraces her sister, uttering that she needs her, too. They stroll from the casket, and Cassie latches onto Josh's arm as he inquires of Jonathan. Billy takes Reva's hand and Reva shrugs, teary eyed. Cassie surmises that Jonathan's not ready to be here.
Daisy taps Reva's shoulder and her grandmother turns around, elated to see her. Billy, her grandfather, also acknowledges her. Gus looks on, nodding his approval, it seems, of Daisy's efforts. Harley tells him that she really didn't know how much she missed Daisy till she showed up. Harley thinks her feelings are heightened by Tammy's funeral. It's such a waste. They discuss making sure Alan pays for this. Frank overhears them and warns them not to take matters into their own hands. Aside, Rick expresses his concerns to Frank that Alan knows he's a suspect and wonders if he will have the nerve to appear at the service.
Meanwhile Cassie receives condolences from Jeffrey. He feels as if Tammy were a daughter to him. Through her tears, she smiles because now he has his own daughter. Jeffrey chagrins that he barely knows Ava. If Tammy ever meant anything to Jeffrey, Cassie urges him to not waste another moment apart from Ava. No matter what's holding him back, it's not worth it. As she walks away, Buzz and Olivia are nearby. Buzz comments that Cassie was talking to both Olivia and Jeffrey.
Father Ray kneels before Cassie as she sits in the front pew with Reva's arm around her. He expresses how he misses Tammy and will begin he service just as soon as Jonathan arrives. Cassie doesn't believe Jonathan will come. As Father Ray rises, the Spauldings darken the threshold.
Alan holds his two girls protectively, instructing them, "Heads high and stare straight ahead." Remy lunges forward, but Gus halts him with his hand. Everyone is piqued by the Spaulding audacity. Josh comments to Billy about how gutsy or really dumb their presence in the church is. Harley wonders at their nerve, saying no one would be in that church if it weren't for him. Alan has no idea what she's talking about. Olivia asks Beth how she could bring Alan here. Beth knows there is a lot of tension, but in her buttery voice, assures everyone that they do not mean to cause trouble. "Tammy was my friend," Lizzie adds. Alan agrees that they simply came to pay their respects as a family.
Harley decides that if Alan were such a nice guy, he'd turn himself in. "For what?" Alan innocently asks. Alan strolls over to Cassie and attempts to officially render his condolences on behalf of the Spaulding family. Josh steps between him and the sisters hugging on the pew. He commands Alan to go on, pay his respects and leave. To Cassie Alan says that he is truly sorry. In a strange way, Cassie believes him. With flat teary eyes and a fragile voice, Cassie says she wants this day to be about only Tammy. She doesn't care what Alan does, stay or go. It's God's house. Everyone is welcome—even him. It's a good thing it's not Reva's house, Reva retorts to Alan. If it were, she'd kick his sorry but out of it. Over the threshold appears Jonathan in a suit, carrying Sarah. He rocks her in his arms. Lizzie's eyes perk at the sight of her child.
Josh shakes Jonathan's hand. Olivia approaches with sincere happiness to see him and kisses him. Ashlee sadly watches as the Coopers and Gus approach. Harley, Frank and Marina promise that they are doing all they can to solve the crime. Rick and others express their emotions as well. Jonathan spots Remy seated on the other side of the room. He walks over to him and Remy stands. He understands that Remy blames him for this. Remy believes there is enough blame to go around, but it doesn't make it right or bring Tammy back. Jonathan and Remy shake hands. Lizzie hopefully approaches, looks at Sarah and asks can she see her. Jonathan turns his back on her without a word.
He hands Sarah to Reva and then he embraces Cassie. As they hug, she apologizes for doubting Tammy and Jonathan's love for each other. Jonathan thinks maybe they needed doubt to help prove how strong their love was. They rock together as they confirm that their love was real and always will be.
The service begins in the round seating. There are two sections of pews. They face each other instead of the casket, which sits where Jonathan and Tammy took their vows. Jonathan sits in the front pew on the right side of the church with Reva, Billy, and the baby while Cassie is in the front pew on the left with Josh and RJ beside her. Cassie rises and comes into the center of the room, standing between the pews with the casket in front of her. Many of the other attendants stand behind her. She attempts to speak a few words about her daughter, but she can't stay composed. Josh and Reva collect her as she breaks down. They reseat her and Josh takes over where Cassie left off talking about her family, "Our family," he adds, staring into Cassie's eyes.
Josh thanks everyone for sharing their grief, for their love and for their devotion. In his quiet and soothing voice, he retells the legend of the how the beam of the lighthouse shines for every soul in Springfield. He centers his attention on Cassie and RJ, explaining that tonight the beam will shine even brighter. Tonight Tammy's soul will light up the night. He sits beside them and Father Ray commences the prayer. Before it begins, Jonathan decides to speak.
Standing, he explains that he never went to church. It wasn't that he didn't believe in things. He believes in good and evil. Sometimes it's hard to tell who's which. Not this time, he says. He agrees that Tammy's soul was bright. He doesn't know what a soul is; he's never seen one. But if anyone had a soul, it was Tammy. She had to have one in order to forgive a guy like him for being "a guy like him." Kneeling before Sarah in Reva's lap, he explains that Tammy taught him how to love someone. He wasn't always a good student. Now she's gone. They don't have her smile or her voice. They cannot feel her. They cannot see her. They cannot love her when loving her is what would make them feel whole.
He says he got married in that church a few days ago. He can see where they stood, the candles that they lit. The ceremony went so fast and he wishes he could have stopped it, frozen it, so he'd never forget any of it. They stood right here, Jonathan says, posing on the exact spot. Now he looks at this box, he tells them. His hands span out as if to frame in his sights the rose covered coffin. He looks at a box that contains what's left of his wife, and his love for her is mixed. It's mixed with hate. Jonathan spies the Spauldings who stand in a distant corner. Alan's arms are miserably crossed as the ladies guiltily stand with him. Jonathan says he is still learning, but he will not quit.
With Tammy's dying breath, she told him to take care of "our daughter." He says that's what Sarah would have been: theirs. "That's what I'm going to do, Tammy. For you, for all the love you gave me, for all the love you didn't live to give to our little girl. No goodbyes kid," He says with a sob. "You wait for me. Wherever you are, save me a spot. I'll find you, no matter what. I'll find you." As he falls into tears, everyone gathers. Some place white roses on the casket.
Choked with tears, Cassie unfolds a piece of paper and stares hopelessly at it. Buzz leans over her in the pew. She says she wanted to read it, but she doesn't think she can. She asks Buzz to do it. "‘A Prayer for a Very new Angel' by Violet Allen Story," Buzz reads. His voice is played over the scene, reciting, "God, God be lenient in her first night there. The crib she slept in was so near by bed. Her blue and white wool blanket was so soft, her pillow hallowed so to fit her head. Teach me that you'll not want small rooms or me, when she has you in heaven's immensity." As he reads, Father Ray blesses the casket. "I always left a light out there in a hall. I hoped to make her feel as in the dark, and yet, she was so small. One little light, not in the room, it scarcely mattered. Hark. No, no she seldom cried." Cassie's void stare faces ahead. Remy, Frank, Gus, Josh, Rick and Jeffrey raise Tammy's casket from the floor. Jonathan sits opening sobbing, his face wet with tears. The attendants all rise. The precession from the church begins with Tammy. As they file out, Buzz's recitation ends, "God, not too far for her to see, this first night, light a star."
Jonathan pauses at the door with Billy, Reva and Sarah, still sobbing. He's not ready to give her up. Reva tells him that this isn't letting her go. Cassie emerges with Buzz. She hugs and kisses Jonathan. She stares at him and gives him a firm shake around the shoulders for strength before continuing with out the door.
Some time later, Jonathan and Reva go back into the church. Jonathan asks Reva to hold the baby for moment. He goes into another part of the church and Reva settles on a pew, telling fussy Sarah how good she was today, a real tribute to the Shayne womanhood. Alan rounds the pew denouncing Sarah's claims to Shayne. Sarah is a Spaulding.
Reva hugs the child protectively. Alan feels there is no need for dramatics now that the funeral has ended. It's time to get on with normal life and work out a way to share the baby. Reva scoffs at him through her tears. Nothing is normal. Today is about the death of a beautiful girl, about broken hearts all over the town, and about the man directly responsible. That would be her son, Alan accuses. Jonathan appears and shoves Alan, demanding that he stay away from his kid. Or what, wonders Alan, he'll burn down his house? Alan says he has evidence.
If Alan needs evidence, look at his hands, Jonathan screams. He slams Alan into a pew and clutches Alan's wrists. Shaking them in the air, Jonathan yells that the blood is all over his hands. He'll never wash it off, he'll never be clean, and he'll never make it right. Alan pries him off and Jonathan demands to know why he didn't throw a flower in her grave. It's because he knows she doesn't belong in there, Jonathan says. Alan agrees, adding that Jonathan is the one who should be in there. Jonathan wants to know if that's an admission or a threat. Neither, Alan replies. Jonathan wants Alan to be in that grave. He doesn't deserve to live.
"You hear that Reva? He threatened me!" Alan looks over Jonathan's shoulder to Reva who anxious coddles the baby. To Jonathan, he says, "You want to be a killer! It's in you! Go ahead!" Alan blasts him for his widower act. "Everyone knows that the first time you see a beautiful woman in tight jeans—" Alan can't finish because Jonathan roars and pounces on him. Billy appears, breaking the two apart. It's not over, Jonathan warns, clawing to get at Alan. No, Alan agrees. It isn't because he doesn't have Sarah yet. Reva screams at Alan to get out of there while he can still walk out.
Moments later, frazzled Jonathan tells Uncle Billy and his mother that Alan won't stop. He's liable to kidnap the baby. Reva keeps trying to assure him that they'll fight him, but skeptical and frantic, Jonathan still sulks around the sanctuary in thought. Reva hands him Sarah. She needs her father. Jonathan cradles the baby and asks Billy to take Reva back to Cassie's. Billy wants Jonathan and Sarah to ride with them, but Jonathan decides to stay at the church a little longer. Staring into Reva's weary face, he says that he has Sarah with him. He won't do anything crazy. As the two leave, Jonathan stops them and says, "Ma, I love you." Reva smiles through her tears and returns the love. Alone, Jonathan settles into a pew and stares into beautiful Sarah's wide eyes.
Meanwhile on the church steps, Cassie cuddles with Josh, reading the obituary. "Tammy Winslow Randall, beloved wife, daughter and sister...She was so much more, Josh. She was so much more..."
Outside the church (the real outdoors.) it's a sunny day as Alan strides away from the small white chapel. He stamps out a cigar before climbing into the back of his limo alone. Jonathan is in his Green sedan waiting. He kisses the locket, hangs it on the mirror, and turns around in his seat to tell someone (Sarah, I assume) that it's okay. He drives off (onto an actual road) after the limo.
"Hold on...Okay...Okay..." Jonathan keeps saying, expelling heavy breaths and pounding the steering wheel. In his head echoes Alan's earlier taunt about him wanting to be a killer. The sun bounces off the car windows as Jonathan pursues Alan's limo on a winding stretch of road. In the back of Alan's limo, he thumbs through a baby catalog unaware that Jonathan follows. "Hold on, baby," Jonathan says, speeding up and driving on the yellow lines.
At the farm, Cassie, Josh and RJ enter to find a house full of people. Josh ambles over to Billy. Billy notes that he seems surprised. Josh expected to see Reva. Billy says that's also what he expected. Josh concludes that Billy doesn't know where she is and becomes concerned. Billy says that Reva plans on coming, and he knows that she's very worried about Jonathan. Josh senses something wrong. Looking around, he sees Cassie's grateful face smiling at him. He turns to Billy and says that he guesses Reva can take care of herself.
Meanwhile, Alan's driver notifies him that they have a situation behind them. Alan glances through the back window to see Jonathan erratically weaving behind them. "Lose him!" he orders the driver.
In the kitchen at the farm, Olivia dials Ava and is relieved to get her voicemail. She leaves her an awkward message, wondering if they can get together and talk about her Paris trip. Before she can finish, she overhears Jeffrey on the porch doing the same thing. He cuts the recording short when he sees Olivia listening, defending that it was only leaving a message about legal stuff.
Back on the road, the limo wildly takes the curves, but Jonathan is still hot on their trail as both cars jerk and screech all over the road. Faster, Alan cries as Jonathan tries to pull up beside them. They barrel between two red barns, now off the road entirely. Jonathan huffs, his teeth gnashing as he jostles over the rocky terrain, still chasing the limousine. The limo's tires kick up dusty dirt and Jonathan's green Taurus is barely visible in the haze. More tires squeal.
At the new dinner table, Beth raises an oversized glass of white wine, noting that Alan should be back already. Lizzie cuts her food, speculating that perhaps he will not come back. Beth doesn't want her saying things like that. In a toneless voice Lizzie knows that it's what everyone else would say. Beth, also without inflection, says that they are not perfect, but they are a family. They are together. It's a blessing. At that, Lizzie rolls her eyes, slaps down her napkin and stalks to the door. She swivels in the doorframe and declares that the family is a curse. Everyone thinks they are crazy, evil, just plain selfish. "And they're right. I hate you. I hate Granddad. I hate this hole in my heart that I can't fix! If this is what it means to be a parent," she declares, "I wish—the baby had never been born."
Jonathan slows his car to a stop. Around a bend on a dirt road, the driver pulls up by a silver building, and he tells Alan that he thinks he lost Jonathan. Jonathan takes energizing breaths, staring ahead. He touches Sarah in the backseat. "Okay, Baby," he says and starts the car again. He mows down a stop sign and plows through the thicket. From the bottom of a ravine, we see the car soaring over a cliff. As it smashes into ground, Tammy's death theme song crashes into the scene, echoing the impact, "...From the ache that voids my soul. Steals light from my every day..." Flipped upside down, the car explodes. Smoke billows up the hillside. When it clears, Reva is standing at the edge, Screaming, "Jonathan! No! Jonathan! No!" Violins heighten as devastated, Reva cries, staring at the fire.